d20 Top Fashion Games Stupid Fantasy Laws Vol. 4.pdf

STUPID FANTASY LAWS, VOL. 4:

Credits:

Written And Edited By David Woodrum

Published By Top Fashion Games

www.topfashiongames.com

CONTACT:

Game Label:

Top Fashion Games

594 Stoney Battery Road

Marion, VA 24354

Author:

David (Dave) Woodrum

davewoodrum@comcast.net

Original Graphics:

David (Dave) Woodrum

About The Author:

Dave Woodrum has worked in the role playing game industry for over seven years. Most of

his success, however, has been over the last two years writing on various related products.

Dave lives in the Eastern part of the United States.

UNIVERSALLY COMPATIBLE:

This product contains information that is designed to be universally compatible with most

forms of paper and dice, fantasy role playing games. Information regarding coinage, etc.

has been explained within the text of the product to allow ease of conversion.

EXPLORING THE MOST WONDROUSLY STUPID AND QUITE

CERTAINLY PERHAPS THE MOST OPPRESSIVE LAWS OF THE

LAND:

While murder, rape, exploitation, theft, and abuse are certainly novel selections for crimes

appropriately punished these infractions against society are rather… well, terribly bland and a bit

too straight to the point. So straight to the point, in fact, that any true, red blooded village

wracked with superstitious idealizations should have little to fear from the threat of such obvious

crimes. Real villages and communities need crimes rooted from pathetic inner fears. Real

villages need stupid, oppressive laws.

Based on both the superstitions of the past and the inactive laws still written on the books

throughout the real world comes Stupid Fantasy Laws, Volume 4. In this role playing product

you will find a dozen different laws that are based on the erratic judgment of rulers, the irrational

fears of villagers, oppressive social customs, and the unusual outcomes of very seldom occurring

situations.

THE SYSTEM:

The laws are presented in a manner that makes them truly universal with most role playing

products of a fantasy nature. For the most part actual game statistics are avoided. For fines where

a currency value is set, consult the below notes regarding the relative values of listed currency

amounts.

1copper= a small amount of money, equal in value to the purchase of a simple torch, a very small

loaf of bread, or the petty offering to a beggar.

1silver= a staple monetary sum, equal to a poor, unskilled laborer’s work for one day or a plain,

simple meal at a small inn. One silver coin is worth around ten copper coins.

1gold= a sum of money mostly used by skilled craftsmen, merchants, and aristocrats. One gold

coin is worth around ten silver coins.

In addition to monetary fines, various forms of punishment are also listed. This might range from

a day in the stocks to execution or exile. Also provided in the notes is a section called Probable

Cause. This area reflects upon a possible reason as to why the law might have been established. If

desired the game master should feel free to develop their own reasoning for the establishment of

such a law.

THE LAWS:

Below are the dozen laws presented in Stupid Fantasy Laws, Volume 4.

Bloodstock Restriction:

It is unlawful for anyone to prepare a soup,

stew, broth, or other similar recipe with

bloodstock that was not obtained from a

domestic livestock source.

Punishment: Any individual found guilty of

this crime shall be fined 5 silver coins and

required to spend two weeks of

imprisonment.

Probable Cause: This law was made

effective in order to keep cheap taverns and

inns from serving soups and broths made

from the blood of rats and other foul, sickly

creatures.

and weapon is likewise expected to pay a

fine of 5 silver coins. Should the sheath or

weapon be soiled from blood or gore then

the owner is expected to pay a fine of 2 gold

coins instead.

Probable Cause: As weapons requiring a

sheath are used in slaughter and bloodshed

then it is believed that these weapons (and

hence their sheaths) could carry the diseases

of foul monsters.

Free Bleeder Law:

It is unlawful for a free bleeder to be found

within the territory of the community.

Punishment: Should an individual within

the territory of the community be or become

a free bleeder then the individual shall be

immediately exiled. Should the individual

attempt to return then the individual shall be

put to death.

Probable Cause: It is believed by the

superstitious folk that the presence or touch

of free bleeders cause miscarriages and a

host of diseases.

Dirty Faces Law:

It is unlawful for any individual, citizen or

commoner, to be caught with a dirty face in

public.

Punishment: Any individual caught with a

dirty face shall have mud or sewage ground

violently into their face before being sent to

the stocks for three days.

Probable Cause: This law was brought into

effect to promote a more decent appearance

within the community.

Garlic And Wound Law:

Any wound that causes bleeding must be

treated with garlic.

Punishment: Should an individual’s wound

be found untreated with garlic then the

individual shall be hung upside down from a

tree until the blood from the wound stops

pouring.

Probable Cause: It is believed by the

superstitious folk that the presence of such

untreated blood invites the presence of

vampires.

Dirty Sheath Law:

It is unlawful for the sheath of any sword,

dagger, or knife of sufficient size to be

found in soiled or dirty condition when such

a sheath is located within the territory of the

community.

Punishment: Any sheath found to be soiled

or dirty shall be subject to destruction. The

weapon of such a sheath shall also be

confiscated and destroyed or kept by the

ruling government. The owner of the sheath

Punishment: Upon discovery of such an

individual the guilty party shall be

immediately put to death.

Probable Cause: This is a fairly common

law devised to keep the breeding of orcish

blood down.

Horse Burial Law:

It is unlawful for a horse to be buried in a

manner other than on their side.

Punishment: Should a horse be buried feet

down or feet up then the individual

responsible for such a burial shall be

sentenced to a full two years of

imprisonment and/or hard labor.

Probable Cause: It is believed by the

superstitious that horses buried in a manner

other than on their side causes the carcasses

of these creatures to rise from the grave as

nightmares.

Outdoor Fire Law:

It is unlawful for any individual to be caught

building an open, outdoor fire for the

purpose to cook foods or for warmth when

such a fire is within half a mile of a village

inn or other dwelling of lodging .

Punishment: Upon discovery of this crime

all gathered around the fire shall have

buckets of cold water dumped upon their

hands before being put into the stocks for a

duration of two days.

Probable Cause: In addition to

discouraging the homeless it is believed that

“camping out” detracts from the profits of

local inns and taverns.

Newt Law:

It is unlawful for any individual to be in

possession of a live or dead newt.

Punishment: Upon discovery of such

possession the guilty party shall be subject

to no less than fifty lashes with a whip.

Probable Cause: It is believed that such

creatures are used in the brews of witches.

Nightmare Restriction Law:

Any non-citizen who admits to having bad

dreams shall not be permitted to sleep at an

inn or any place of lodging within the

territory of the community.

Punishment: Any individual who admits to

such dreams and is not a citizen shall be

required to sleep outside of the territory of

the community. Should such an individual

be found sneaking into the village afterwards

for the purpose of gaining a peaceful rest

shall be subject to four constant days and

nights of horrid, skillful torture.

Probable Cause: It is believed that the bad

dreams of strangers call forth monsters.

No Whistling Law:

It is unlawful for any individual other than a

member of the respectful aristocracy or

nobility to be caught whistling in public.

Punishment: Upon discovery of such an act

the guilty party shall be struck an amount no

less than twenty times with a cane.

Probable Cause: It is believed that

whistling is another outlet that the poor and

uneducated use to make an unnecessary

nuisance of themselves.

Orcish Blood Ban:

It is unlawful for any individual with orcish

blood, whether they be whole orc or merely

part orc, to be found within the territory of

the community.

Pink Law:

It is unlawful for any male to be caught

wearing a pink garment or a considerable

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