The Drink Tank 004 (2005).pdf

The Drink Tank

An Issue of Fourth

More Thoughts and strangenesses

Written and Directed by

Christopher J. Garcia

Max Schmeling: 1905-2005

I'm bothered by the fact that the death of one of the truly great boxers

of the last 100 years hasn't been covered by more outlets. Max

Schmeling was one of the great, though his record may not be as

impressive as others. I had a prof at Emerson who called him "The

Schindler of Sport" because he hid two young Jewish boys during

Krystaalnacht and later helped several others escape Germany. He was

one of Hitler's favourites, but he also used his influence to get the black

athletes at the Berlin Games safe treatment. Hitler soured on Max and

sent him into the war as a paratrooper, hoping he would be killed and

could be used as a dead hero to rally his troops. Max did not abide.

Later in life, he owned a portion of the German Coke franchise and

became rich. He became close friends with former rival Joe Louis. He

often made it to the important events in the history of boxing and wrote

a truly engrossing autobiography.

Am I the Spectre of Death?

In recent years, there have been too many deaths of the all-time greats of science fiction and of

SF fandom. Harry Warner, Kelly Freas, Julie Schwartz, all of them important cogs in my Fannish

life. There have been a number of close calls, like Forry's illness a couple of years back. There is a

sad truth though: I may, in fact, be responsible for killing three of the greats.

I had the honour of being on the final panel that Marion Zimmer Bradley would ever do. It was a

lovely piece of work, afterwards I gave her greeting from my Dad who had known her a bit back in

the day. She passed on a good amount later, but Pops still joked that I had been the cause of

death.

2000's Baycon saw me doing a couple of panels, including one with Poul Anderson. We had a

nice chat about antique cameras after. About six months later, Poul passed. This got me

thinking, but both MZB and Poul weren't in the best of shape when I met them, so it must have

just been a coincidence.

Douglas Adams visited my museum to give a talk. I got to show him around and the two of us

held court around one of the machines in the collection, talking about science fiction and what

everyone missed when they tried to write the future. Two weeks later, Adams had his heart

attack.

Now, luckily, not every writer feels the effects of my curse, or we'd also have lost Niven, Pournelle,

Gerrold, Vinge, Brin, Ellison, Ray Nelson and Steve Barnes. Oddly, I was supposed to do a panel

with Forry, but he missed the panel due to poor health. Maybe my reputation had preceded me at

half-strength.

The Drink Tank is written by Christopher J. Garcia and posted to the best website in fandom, efanzines.com, by Bill

Burns. Created using the full suite of Adobe products. All stuff written by Mr. Garcia himself is free to reuse without

permission in any medium per Garcia's Free Use statement (see YANKspot Mag, June 1997). Send any

correspondence to garcia@computerhistory.org. The next issue should appear by Feb. 19.

The Drink Tank

An Issue of Fourth

M. Lloyd and I have an on-going argument: who is the better writer,

Gordon Eklund or Stephen Goldin. The battle is fierce, as I have held my

ground saying that Eklund's work after his Laser books was not nearly as

much fun. M volleys a claim that Scavenger Hunt, in Laser form, feels

truncated but is far more fun than the full version. Of course, both of us

hold the exact opposite opinion when it comes to those two particular

stances.

The battle started when I started collecting Laser books. I've always loved

Kelly Freas' art and the series was numbered, so it made it easy to know

how many more you needed to buy before you had them all. M borrowed

some of them and we both got hooked on the stuff.

Serving in Time by Eklund is a decent book, though it would not hold up

with many current readers. Caravan and Herds by Goldin are also fun and

more than a little pulpy. I'd say that it's close, but Goldin's post-Laser stuff

is better than Eklund's non-fannish PLS.

A Very Short Story

The Ladies of La Marche

My definition of terror is being

the low man on the totem pole

in front of a crowd. On the first

Baycon panel I did, I was the

only one without a Hugo or a

PhD. My reading at the Make-

out Room in San Francisco on

Saturday will be another of

those times. I'm reading with a

respected Fantasy writer, a

great poet and a non-fictionalist

whose latest book is 100% Bad

Ass. I'm doomed, as my piece is

about wrestling and I'm not the

best talker.

Every woman in the lobby of La Marche stood gorgeous

against the teak-paneled walls. Every one of their eyes

dazzled in invitation. No failed turn of the scultor's chisel

showed on any of them, their dresses draping and clinging

in spots of perfection. The only flaw they all shared was the

tail they would theatrically expose when they'd turn their

backs on their johns and drop the dress. The poor men who

did not find this exciting would run out of the room, leaving

their pants and wallets behind, forfeiting them to the

management, as the sign on the door had warned them.

More Madames should take to studying BioEngineering

I'm always on the look-out for another project to start working on, whether it's a story, a short

film or even a novel. I'm currently writing for Crass Dandy (Jay Crasdan's up-coming zine),

dropping stuff to Jan Stinson's Peregrine Nations, Matt Appleton's Some Fantastic, and the

Catchpenny Gazette. That's on top of Falls Count Anywhere for Fanboyplanet.com twice a week

and doing this e-rag as often as I can. All in all, I've got a lot of time on my hands for another

movie. I know my group of guys wants to do an action film, but honestly, that's an incredibly

hard sell right now. Festivals have seen too many of them and even if there well done, they don't

carry much weight. I'd love to do an adaptation of Ayelet Waldman's Minnow. It's a weepy SF

story that I would just love to tackle. There's my script Good Hitler, about Adolf's Grandson

trying to make up for what his Grandpa did. I've got a story about a female scientist in the early

1900s who builds a device to bring out ghost images. There are a bunch of short ideas that I

have and mostly, folks aren't too interested in trying to do them.

My guess is I'll only get to four films this year, one below what I had hoped. If the money comes

in for 5 Suicides, that'll replace all but one or two of them. Then again, that's about 200K away.

The Drink Tank

An Issue of Fourth

Reviews by M. Lloyd and Christopher J. Garcia

Rasputina's Cabin Fever

Reviewed by M. Lloyd

If Charles Babbage's computers had

worked, all modern rock would sound like

Rasputina. Chris told me that once and I

agree. Cello rock is somewhat rare, but

Rasputina does it right. Too quaint to be

Avant-Garde, too edgy to be nostalgia,

Cabin Fever is an album that flows with

energy in many directions. There are

Industrial-Gothic beat like Rats and, my

personal favorite, Antique High Heel Red

Doll Shoes.

There are a couple of pieces that suggest

olden times. The Rememnants of Percy

Bass is my choice as the best of these,

reminding me of one of Chris' short film

finds The Fine Art of Poisoning. There are

several that seem to float between these

two ends, sounding a bit like they came

from The Magnetic Fields. The strangest

thing is a supposed double date between

Bjork and some guy and PJ Harvey and

some guy. It is a rather brutal skewering

to say the least.

The beauty of Rasputina is the pastiche

that these ladies bring out. The vocals

are emotional at times, but always

playful. In a perfect world, songs like

Rats would be dance music.

Jennifer Barker and Orlando Seale in Untitled 003: Embryo

Untitled 003: Embryo

Reviewed by Christopher J. Garcia

Special effects are both a curse and a Godsend.

They can kill a movie by replacing elements like

character and plot, or they can add much needed

drama. Well used, CGI can make a good story

great, and Belief's Untitled 003: Embryo is an

example.

The story is of Jason, an agoraphobic after an

accident with a piece of airmail. He receives a

package containing a machine. The machine ends

up sucking people's dreams. He brings his would

be girlfriend Audrey over and the two of them

investigate.

The short stars a pair of actor who aren't very

recognisable, but also one of the people who get

their dreams sucked is Ethan Phillips of Benson

and Voyager fame. It's a delightful little twenty

minute work that uses the effects beautifully. The

captured dream sequences are comical and

gorgeous...almost as gorgeous as Jennifer Barker!

Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet

Animal Planet ran Puppy Bowl all Super Bowl Sunday. It was Puppies frolicking in a pen

shaped like a football stadium. There were dozens of cameras, including a Bowl Cam at the

bottom of the water bowl. Next to Monkey Channel (Sunnyvale Educational Channel's Summer

Placeholder which was 24 hours a day of a chalk-drawn Monkey) it was easily the most addictive

thing I've ever seen on TV.

The Week in Efanzines.com

The first week of February saw 12 updates on efanzines.com, THE source for fanzines, and as

usual, I was highly entertained. Three of them were issues of The Drink Tank and another three

were Dick Geis' Taboo Opinions (Which I never agree with, but like the way he presents them).

Arnie Katz gives us Vegas Fandom Weekly, which was very good. Aside from Rich Brown's tirade

against the best-written fanzine out right now, Emerald City, I loved Earl Kemp's eI. I had a

story in Peregrine Nations' latest fantastic issue, and I'll talk more about Back Numbers later.

The Drink Tank

An Issue of Fourth

Standard Fandom Complaint

Reading Rich Brown's article in Earl Kemp's eI reminded me that I've been reading a lot of

fanzines out of the SF genre, that is they don't directly comment on science fiction or SF fandom.

There are dozens of Anime fanzines, far less than there were in the early 1990s, but there are a

great many out there. Reading them, I realised that I never saw the level of spite in them that I

found in many SF fanzines. Now surely, they are still ruled by Garcia's Law (any shared interest

grouping of ten or more people will always have at least 2 people who can't stand the site of each

other), so why isn't there more bile vented in their pages?

I turn to something my dad once said: 'there are issues of jealousy, issues of payback, but

mostly, fanzine writers are just grumpy.' It's almost as if people feel the need to issue receipts

after every miniature slight. The Brown/Morgan issue I can see as Rich taking umbrage at

Cheryl's methods, but honestly, to me, all that matters is the work presented and all the things he

mentioned were just politics that I personally don't care about. You NEVER see this in anime

zines, nor in old school wrestling fanzines. Once in a while, you'd come across something like

that in a Punk zine, but that's a volatile crowd.

I don't know if fanzine fandom will ever come together and stop the bickering. Sadly, I doubt

they will. The folks who don't participate in the squabbling in the pages of their zines are the

ones I tend to read and enjoy. Say whatever you like on a bulletin board, that's what they're for,

but why not try to keep the pages of your work free of that crap that just keeps folks from seeing

that Fanzine Fandom has a lot to offer.

Warren Harris' Back Numbers Can Be Easily Procured14

I'm a huge fan of the pulp era. I collect issues of old magazines from the 30s, 40s and 50s. I was

once told by a collector that I had destroyed a half-dozen highly-prized mags with my insistence

on reading them. Warren Harris' Back Numbers salutes that era and does it as well, if not better,

than any of the other mags that do the same. My favourite story of Issue 14 had to be the one on

Rear Window, tracing it from the original story it was based on, Woolrich's It Had To Be Murder.

The story examines both the film and the short story in detail, making a film buff and a mystery

maven like me very happy.

The Logo for Office Supply

Pictures.

Created by Steve Sprinkles.

My Big Scary Film Project

2005 is supposed to be the year that I make my first

feature film: 5 Suicides. A distinct departure from all my

other efforts, 5 Suicides is the story of a young reporter who

is asked to go to a small mountain town to discover the truth

behind the deaths of five unrelated deaths. It's dark, it's

moody, and the chance of a lifetime for one actress to carry a

Noir.

It also goes that I've not managed to raise a single dollar to

make it.

Money makes films, so the saying goes, and though I've had

meetings with some very powerful people, I've not managed

to convince anyone to invest. Why? When they run the

numbers, they realise that there's no way it can make them

any money. So it goes. If anyone wants to read the script, let

me know or better yet, send 20k and I'll give ya a copy!

The Drink Tank

An Issue of Fourth

Comments and Complaints

Sent to Garcia@computerhistory.org

By My Gentle Readers

Helen Spiral- UK

Hi Chris/topher,

M Lloyd- Geelong, AU

Ok, you've got your review of

Rasputina. Issue Three looks better,

especially since there are a few photos.

I must say that reading about Stacked

Decks made me start an article I've been

thinking about doing all these many

years.

I must say also that one of the things

that I love about The Drink Tank are the

little pieces of fiction. They are most

aptly described as cute.

Thank you, M. I've given up on

salable fiction, but the Tiny stuff

remains!!!

I'm one of the anonymous downloaders via

efanzines. I enjoyed your ultra short fic in DT2.

(In response to my story on Hispanic Science

Fiction or the lack thereof)

Try Canadian author Charles De Lint's Newford

urban fantasy books maybe? He has a normal mix of

characters with a normal mix of backgrounds. By

normal I mean varied and lifelike not bleached and

washed whiter-than-life (except for the occasional

vampire!). I don't know how accurate his Hispanic

character's ethnicities are? You tell us,

Helen

Thanks for Anonymifying yourself. You know,

I've never read any De Lint. I'm adding him to

my list after I finish the next SteamPunk novel

and then I'll pass it on to Bailey. Thanks for the

kind words about the Very Short, though it

means I will continue doing them from now on!

Miles Contreau- LA, CA

I'm interested in your short film reviews.

You seem to like shorts, but I've never

seem any of the ones you've reviewed.

What can I do to see more of them?

Miles

There are a few ways. The efanzines

of short films, ifilm.com, has a lot of

great shorts in all genres. They have

a great SciFi section that includes

films like JFK1138, Glengary Glen

Darth and about 50 things that end

in -trix. It's great site. Film festivals

pretty much all have shorts

programmes, and you can see a lot

more there. You may also want to try

the series of DVDs called Short.

Manny Sanford- Santa Clara, CA

There's a lot of good stuff that you're writing. I've

liked most of the Aztec/Mayan/Incan themed writing

that I've read, Alexander Irvine's book being one of the

best of them, and I'm hoping that there's a lot more

from the guy besides the short work that has been a

little disappointing.

Knowing that you're a steampunk fan, what do you

think of Army of Darkness as the perfect example of

Medievil steampunk? I've always thought that it was

exactly what steampunk was supposed to be.

I thought that same thing about Raimi's film.

It's a time travel story, it uses strange

technologies in an old world, and they make a

new hand out of existing techniques.

Irvine and China Mieville strike me as very

similar.

We also got mail from Jay Crasdan,

Bill Burns, Al Morrow-Saint, Shelly

T., K.A. Wells, and Chuckie Deivers

(I'll publish his note somday in an

issue dedicated to filth!)

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