2.G15-275 - PLANET of the SPIDERS.pdf

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Spiders
2
PLANET
OF THE
SPIDERS
Ulysses Ai
PLANET of the SPIDERS
At last! The unanticipated sequel to Wrong Way Go Back has arrived! Jam-
packed with 81.667% more references, and a whopping 400% increase in
combat encounters!
CREATING YOUR CHARACTER
If you played Wrong Way Go Back , you can continue your adventure with
the same character here. Otherwise, read on:
Roll 1 die and add 6. The total is your SKILL. This represents your
general ability to perform tasks. If you are ever asked to test your SKILL, roll
2 die. If the total is the same or less than your SKILL, then you are successful.
If the dice roll is higher, then you have failed. SKILL is also used in combat as
explained below.
Roll 2 dice and add 12. The total is your STAMINA. This represents your
strength, fitness, life and energy. If this is ever reduced to 0, then you are
dead. Certain items can increase STAMINA. The passages you read will tell
you when you have lost STAMINA and when and how it can be restored.
Roll 1 die and add 6. The total is your LUCK. This represents your
general fortune. Sometimes the outcome of this is determined purely by luck.
Spiders
3
If you are asked to test your LUCK, do so in the way as for the test of SKILL.
The only difference is that when you test your LUCK, you must reduce your
current LUCK by 1.
COMBAT
There are 5 combat encounters in this book, and you will have to go
through at least 2. When you reach one, you will be given your opponent’s
SKILL and STAMINA scores. Conduct the combat as follows.
1. Roll 2 dice and add the result to your SKILL. The total is your Attack
Strength.
2. Roll 2 dice and add the result to your opponent’s SKILL. The total is
their Attack Strength.
3. Compare the two Attack Strengths. If your AS is higher, then you have
wounded your opponent (go to Step 4). If their AS is higher, then they
have wounded you (go to Step 5).
4. You have wounded your opponent. Reduce their STAMINA by 2.
Now return to Step 1 for the next round.
5. You have been wounded. Reduce your STAMINA by 2. Now return
to Step 1 for the next round.
This process continues until either you or your opponent’s STAMINA is 0.
If your STAMINA reaches 0, you are dead. If your opponent’s STAMINA
reaches 0, you have defeated them and can continue the story.
Some combats will have special rules and these will be explained in the
reference.
HINTS ON PLAY
Beware; some things that seem useful are decoys. There is more than one
way to do some things.
BACKGROUND
Spiders
4
The spider scuttles forward aggressively, hairy legs waving in the air as it
rears up, fangs displayed. With a weary sigh, you extend the long plastic
tube in your hand and suck the small spider up into a storage unit in the
equipment worn on your back.
“It’s safe now,” you say.
A whir of motors comes from the next room, and one of the denizens of
Teeheehee pokes her lovely head around the corner of the doorway, eyes
wide with the haunting memory of the horrible spider.
“Oh, thank you!” she exclaims, emerging to embrace you with sincere
gratitude.
You sigh once more. It was supposed to be a dream job. A planet full of
women, helpless before a hoard of small, non-poisonous spiders; needing
someone to come and deal with them. The woman on the monitor was so
beautiful that you did not hesitate to agree, imagining how they could express
their gratitude. But looking now at the Teeheeheean before you, you
remember keenly the disappointment you felt that day you boarded their
ship, and every day as you receive countless hugs and kisses from them.
The clues were there. The woman was green; a little odd you thought, but
hardly an obstacle for a lusty young man like yourself. She told you that they
produced asexually, so there were no males on their planet; great! No need to
share.
Now you understand all too well. She stands before you like some kind of
arboreal mermaid: a lovely humanoid woman, green, above the waist; and a
bark-covered tree below. Up from her back grow a number of long delicate
fronds, and she has a halo of buds ready to flower growing around her head.
Initially, trying to make the best of a bad situation, you eyed their naked
upper sections hopefully. But the embraces with which they greeted you as
their saviour tore away your last hope as you clasped their woody bodies in
your hands. No soft, yielding flesh; it was about as satisfying as hugging a
giant broccoli.
Leaving the house, the woman; if it can be called that; escorts you to the
front door, thanking you profusely. Her roots are buried in a large, blue,
glazed pot that sits atop a pair of motorised treads, allowing her to roll along
at your side with a whir. You disentangle yourself from her embraces and
move off down the street.
As alien planets go, Teeheehee is a nice one. The whole planet is like a
landscaped garden. The Teeheeheeans feed directly on sunlight via
photosynthesis, and so have never needed to labour to live. Instead they fill
their days with leisure and gardening, their one passion.
Returning to the small house where you live, you see with relief that the
alarms are not ringing. Each room is fitted with a siren and a flashing red
light that will alert you when one of the natives sees a spider.
Spiders
5
Dumping your equipment on the floor, you collapse into an armchair.
Not for the first time, you reflect on your life. Nothing you have ever done
has gone to plan, yet this uncertainty and unpredictability has failed to result
in any excitement, apart from one brief episode involving a luxury cruiser
falling into a star. But that’s not the kind of excitement you need.
As always, you reach one inevitable conclusion: you need a girlfriend! But
how to get one? Every time you suggest leaving, the treemaids start crying
and offering you whatever you want. Unfortunately what you want is the
one thing they can’t provide.
As you are just getting into feeling sorry for yourself, the alarms sound,
the lights flashing. Sighing, you collect your equipment and walk over to the
screen next to the front door to see the address of the ‘emergency’. Your
eyebrows move slightly as you see that it is the palace.
You went to the palace on your arrival, but you don’t remember much
about it (experiencing as you were at the time a crushing disappointment).
Leaving the house, you stroll up the grand avenue to the many-layered
palace. The palace is a terraced hill with flowering arches leading inside.
Two treemaids stand guard outside, armed with shining spears and blasters.
They bow to you.
“Welcome, honoured spider-catcher!”
You wave, stifling a sigh. Entering into a large, airy passage, you make
your way to the centre of the hill where a grand hall has been built. Sunlight
shines down from large, vacuous windows, illuminating a great tree that
stands in the centre, rooted into the soil of the planet. It is Queen Hotbutt
herself. The great trunk splits into three, the centremost rising up into a
woman, twice life size, with long delicate limbs and a head of flowers. The
other two stems break into boughs that spread into supple leafy branches,
arrayed around her humanoid part like great green wings. Her bark is silvery
grey, and covers her human part as well. But she is very much animated, and
smiles down at you with bright red lips and shining green eyes.
“Welcome, great protector!” she intones, and her entire court of treemaids
bows to you. “My apologies for summoning you with the siren. There is in
fact no spider, but an emergency of another kind.”
“What is it?” you ask, hoping to hear that the planet is plunging into its
sun.
“Show him!” the queen commands.
One of the treemaids whirs forward, offering you a box of tissues. You
regard it with some uncertainty. Many times since your arrival on the planet
you have wished for tissues, especially when visiting a certain small room in
your house. But you refrained from bringing up the matter, as you were
uncertain how the treemaids would react to the idea of anything made from
wood pulp.
“Er, what is this?”

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